Vantucky Valentine’s Day Slide Jam

Ah, what better way to forget the pangs of nonexistent love than amid a dense fog of dudes skateboarding? IMG_4461

Nothing, duh.

IMG_4418

Blake McLam put on a banger event.

IMG_4404

Race in the morning, then slide-jam after. I showed up way too late and missed the race cause I’m a huge pus.

IMG_4395

The jam was hella fun though; it was held on a hill with actual turns which is kinda crazy for the straight-hill-freeriding  local skate population. It was quickly made apparent who was comfortable turning left and right and who was a bit less prepared for corners.

IMG_4394

A barely visible eagle in the distance graced us with its presence. It might not even be an eagle; you’ll just have to take my word for it. Its a twisted world sorry man.

IMG_4387

All the good skaters made a point to lurk back and provide commentary much more than they actually skated.

IMG_4386

IMG_4383

This dude bailed right into where I was standing. Luckily my cat-like reflexes are… cat like.

IMG_4373

IMG_4370

More heart-broken loners mill about aimlessly in search of love.

IMG_4367

Unfortunately all they found was Camden’s steeze. Maybe it was Grant. Whatever it was one of them.

IMG_4364

IMG_4362

IMG_4359

IMG_4356

IMG_4355

IMG_4354

IMG_4348

The man of the house gives the ladies a tour of the shebang.

IMG_4341

IMG_4337

I got a lot of butt flying in my direction; none of which I was particularly down with.

IMG_4335

And a bit of attempted nipple action. Temping, but still not down.

IMG_4332

IMG_4334

The hike up the hill sucked mad dilly, no lie.

IMG_4331

A bit of drift-trike action in the distance.

IMG_4330

IMG_4328

More butt. Always with these pucking butts.

IMG_4327

Here it comes. Basically making a beeline straight for me. TJ Joo; booty magnet.

IMG_4326

IMG_4324

IMG_4323

IMG_4322

One of the Beneshes again with the tweaked steeze. Probably one of the more entertaining types to see at a slidejam.

IMG_4320

IMG_4319

IMG_4318

IMG_4317

IMG_4316

IMG_4310

IMG_4309

It was a really good time getting into shenanigans with my friends in the name of love. Definitely going again next year if I’m not slaying mad poon or something. Y’know. Huuuuuge thanks to Blake for putting on and housing a bunch of skaters for the after-function; you the man.

And if any of you readers see yourself in this post feel free to take my shitty photography and use it for whatever I don’t care.

Churchill’s LAX line: Hoodoo Review

A fresh set of collectible boards have been released under LAX, a subset of the Churchill brand which has recently attracted some attention to itself with clean, basic designs and affordable pricepoint.

This one is called the Hoodoo.

IMG_7649

I gave it to some random lady passing by and took pictures with it.

IMG_7659

And then I rode the bitch.

_MG_3101

The deck, you sickos.

IMG_7665

The board is interesting, to say the least. I mean, look at its profile.

IMG_7652

Shits bacon.

IMG_7656

Bacon.

IMG_7655

Bacon.

And for some reason, it all works.

Its weird because there are two sets of pockets on the deck, inner and outer, which I interpret to mean two different styles of riding the deck.

Its 9 inches wide at the outer pockets where your feet would go for a “freeride” style or riding involving riding switch and keeping a consistent distance between both feet and their respective truck mounts, but about 10 inches wide where the inner pockets are.

For this.. I have only one explanation.

In a tuck, I keep my feet a closer together than when I am freeriding, and so I noticed that I can slip my back foot into the inner pocket to hold my foot in place when I’m leaning through turns while crouched down all tight n snuggly. It also gives a solid platform for digging into when I’m predrifting, a process that I also keep my feet a bit closer together for.

As for the additional width of the deck, I can only assume that it is for structural integrity and additional lateral leverage when I’m cranking down on my back foot while downhilling.

It was kind of unsettling how well the Hoodoo suited my body specifically for a lot of the things I do, so I realize this board may not work perfectly for people with other styles of riding, but the deck totally crushes it in many departments if it matches up with you.

The only real complaint I have about the board is that they have these weird little sem-developed kicks at the ends which would be totally awesome if the wheelbases weren’t drilled so far apart and close to the ends. If the wheelbase was moved in a solid 3 inches the board would feel way more alive and fun, not to mention the kicktails would be much more usable.

Then again, redrilling wheelbases is such a basic do-it-yourself modification that it may not even be worth mentioning; just a thought on what I’m going to do with mine as soon as I get the chance.

Otherwise, the Hoodoo is totally sick if you have a similar riding style to mine, but may be a little extravagant for those who may not have not dialed in how they like to ride yet.

IMG_7646

The Hoodoo definitely does you more than you do it.

Videos That I’ve Rewatched Too Many Times and am Stoked On- Jackson Wells

I don’t know about you guys, but when a video really fuels my stoke, I nerd out and re-watch it… a bunch. I’ll replay clips, jam out to the song they used, reach out to the rider and tell them how cool they are, or whatever inspiration the media gave me (to maybe even go skate?).

Here are some of my recent favorites that have got me amped on longboarding and why.

Justin Rouleau’s Madrid + Pro Model Introduction

This video is perfect in so many ways. Between the hood-ass song, mid-video trap arms from Rouleau and the name of the pro-model being the Trapstar, they really nailed the vibe of the video, and I’m sure made a lot of skaters smile. Beyond the vibe, the skating was super burly as well. The downhill shots incorporated the perfect blend of sketchy-steeze and dialed in lines (1:04 is a prime example). Plus, it’s always dope to see someone freeriding big wheels (Cannibals) and leaving huge ‘thane lines with ridiculous squatters. On top of all that, the camera-work was magnificent and blended fast raw runs with rad static shots. Good job Madrid/Venom/Rouleau and keep a look out for the Trapstar trapstar2015_lg copy

S1 Helmets- Cooper Darquea First Descent

The simplicity of the video combined with how raw the skating was had me watching this at least four times the first day I saw it. Those toeside lines a little before a minute into the video are so on point and precise it’s hard to fathom. Then, he goes charging right into a speed bump? Pshhhhh someone’s good at longboarding. If you haven’t been keeping up on Alex Ameen’s raw runs, you’re blowing it and missing out on sick new downhill clips. All of his video go to show how easy it is to capture crazy skate footage; all you need is a wide angle lens, a car mount and a shredder at your disposal. Then, the gnar gnar will flow like water.

Ethan Cochard’s Newest Raw Run

http://http://www.skatehousemedia.com/01/07/2015/raw-run-ethan-cochard

Yeeeeeyeah buddy! Ethan’s a good friend of mine and this video had me psyched. Shredding a classic, you can really see him enjoying himself and flowing well with the road (even throwing some stoked out arm-steeze at 1:47). Anyone who has skated this can attest for how gnarly, chundery, steep and fast this classic Californian canyon road is, and Ethan handles it like he was born to. Also, he shows the ignorant side of the internet just how stern Orangatangs can thane. One of the more notable raw runs of this fishy hill from one of the coolest longboarders in the scene.

I hope all of these videos got you guys as excited and motivated as they did for me! Always find sources of stoke, then take that stoke and turn it into skating!

Thoughts of An Average Skater: Trends of 2014/15

We asked some our team riders about the year ahead, trends and so on. Bill Kim provided this overview of some major, up and coming tendencies in the scene, while Jackson supplemented his opinions on them. Bill’s text is normal, Jackson’s is italicized.

Thoughts of an average skater: Trends of 2014/2015

Only a month has gone by in the New Year and already new trends have been forming in today’s skate scene. First, we have to talk about what makes things “trendy”. When a large group of people thinks that something is cool and consciously incorporate it into their lives, it makes that thing a trend.

One trend that is very popular from last year is thane lines. These lines are created when skaters slide to shed some speed off or kill their speed entirely. When the wheels leave thane, it is wearing the wheel down. We use these thane lines to show our friends how far we slid. This is heavily found in the younger skaters or “groms”. Although this may not be bad, it does get quite repetitive when someone describes a wheel’s characteristic as “the wheel thanes good” or “thane is cool”.

Oh man, isn’t thane cool? I’ve loved this trend since I was a grom myself and I’m surprised it took till 2014 to SERIOUSLY catch heat. Regardless, people do not understand thane. Wheels that thane are literally tearing away and wearing so fast they leave the material in streaks on the ground. So what’s bad about that? Thaney wheels die fast and wear poorly because its so rapid. So, if you’re on a budget and can’t buy 3,000 freeride wheels a year, forget about always leaving huge thane lines. Also, if you weigh nothing, wheels will not thane that hard unless you’re really good. So, think twice before emailing Cadillac that your wheels are broken and don’t thane. You’re a grom, deal with it. 

Another attribute that is popular is slidey wheels. When I say slidey wheels, I’m talking about the wheels that don’t take any effort to slide and don’t kill any speed. There are pros and cons about wheels that fit this description. Some pros are that they are easy to learn how to slide on, and they slide forever. Some cons are that they may get unpredictable at higher speeds and when switching to other wheels, you may have a hard time transitioning.

This trend is a kid’s thing. You know, for those who don’t have adequate force to slide easily because they don’t weigh enough, go too slow or both. Wheels like this are great for those people, and will probably scare the hell out of anyone who doesn’t fit in that category. Back in my day (2011 what whattttttt), when wheels were icy, it scared us and no one bought those. We tried harder to make what we had what we wanted. Sure, those 82a Raceforms didn’t slide well at first. But, within two lame sessions, they become dope freeride wheels. 

The final aspect that I will be talking about is freeriding. In my opinion, this is the most popular style of riding in the skate scene today. This is the type of riding that I see in the younger generation and it seems like downhill is becoming less popular amongst them. Even though freeriding is more popular than downhill, no style is better than others, so do not put each other down.

HELL YES BILL. Skating is not a popularity contest, do not hate on other styles just because its different from yours. Diversify, stop sliding and go fast. Stop going fast, go freeriding. Or even go shred a park, parking lot, garage, who cares? As long as YOU are skating and having fun, nothing matters. 

Whether you may take part in these trends or not, at the end of the day it is about having fun. So shred what products you want and skate whichever style you’d like. Always remember to skate safe, have fun, and get those baners.

Author: Bill Kim

1487992_847139948651290_5719468775476274833_o

Opinion Supplementer: Jackson Wells

10687907_1566358216925430_664682846656038687_o

5 Questions to Ask to Break the Tension; Playing Nicely with Others and Not Being Weird

You’re at the top of the hill with your friends, some you might know really well and maybe some total strangers. You guys are clipping on your helmets, kicking your board up into your hands, and generally shuffling about waiting for the nonverbal que to go down the hill again. Social anxiety has no place at the top of the hill since you all have some common ground to speak on, but small talk regarding your recent setup tweaks can only take you so far.

How does one truly forge unbreakable bro bonds betwixt bros? How do you make homies? What does it even mean to lurk?

photo-1418226970361-9f1f7227d638

I have no idea.

BUT, here are a few sweet ice-breakers to bust out during a lurk-sesh to put y’all on the fast-track to being butt buddies.

1. What’s the largest animal you think you could kill with your bare hands?

This is always elicits good answers for two reasons: everyone thinks they’re way stronger than they are, and the ridiculous answers will inevitably instigate some friction between machismos. This might push people to prove that they are the ballsier alpha-skater. You’ll hear ridiculous answers like “yeah bro I could probably choke out a deer or something” from people who have no idea how crazy strong a deer’s vitality is. You’ll also hear bullshit like “if a shark washed up on a beach I could just wail on it with my fists until it dies.” Dying from asphyxiating in our atmosphere does not mean you killed it with your bare hands ya dingus. Most people will completely overlook the emu, an incredibly large bird with a proportionally narrow neck that you have a very good chance of being able to wring if you snagged it just right. I am 90% sure that it is the largest animal a human could kill with its bare hands in a fair fight, but I’m sure a bunch of you posers out there beg to differ. Fight me.

photo-1415201179613-bd037ff5eb29

2. Share your secret weapon: the most fire pickup line in your extensive arsenal of lady-killing quotes.

Ahh, nothing brings boys together like girls. You may be uncomfortable unveiling the magic to your raw charisma and animal magnetism to your friends but hey, skating is all about pushing boundaries and by extension SO IS LURKING. So tell all; explain why you should never use correct grammar in text messages to add to your ‘bad-boy’ vibe. Notify your friends that hand-holding is for wussies and that you should always hold hunnies by the waist. Debate the value in not showering the day before the date so that your pheromones are particularly pungent. You can tell a lot about a man by the way he talks about girls; pay attention and unlock the keys to homies and hunnies, you autistic weirdo.

photo-1413913619092-816734eed3a7

3. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten?

Me personally, the weirdest thing I ate was probably silk-worm cocoons during a pilgrimage to the Motherland. Saucy, fibrous, and served to me by a toothless street-vendor in a rolled up newspaper, this gastronomic gamble left me both full and satisfied. See? Easy conversation. Everyone likes food and everyone likes being grossed out by hypotheticals; go nuts.

(Pro-tip, lie about things to make yourself seem cooler)

photo-1416934625760-d56f5e79f6fe

4. What do you think happens after we die? 

I mean, here we are. Constantly surfing the line between a good time and a gristly demise. At any given point and time we can potentially bite the big one and be free of this world for good.

Sucks, I know. Or does it?

Perhaps after our existence concludes in this realm we phase into a new reality; a hyper-dimensional state of cosmic bliss in which you are finally comfortable in your own skin for once and the brink of eternity, for some reason, just doesn’t seem as bleak anymore.

Or maybe we just burn in hell forever because we looked at internet titties.

Maybe we burn because it didn’t stop at internet titties and our sexual perversion went so awry of what is biologically natural that our grand creator decided that she just wasn’t having any of it and needed to put a stop to us.

Or reincarnation. Turn into ghosts. Or nothing.

WHO KNOWS?! The only thing that is certain is that the people you’re with sure as hell don’t know either; go crazy with this one.

URG2BbWQQ9SAcqLuTOLp_BP7A9947

5. Tryna light up? 

This is basically instant friendship. Or jail depending on where you live.

We are not responsible for anything stupid you do or any bad advice you take.

photo-1414849424631-8b18529a81ca

And there you have it. With all this fodder for the friendship-fire, how can one not be thrust into the enlightened bliss of eternal chillin’ n illin’? I have given you the blueprints to bro-hood, the frickin’ bible on how to not be a shy goon with unrealized fantasies of human interaction. You can finally have all the attention your parents deprived you of.

ALL OF IT!

FOR FREE!

BECAUSE I’M SUCH A NICE GUY!

PLEASE BE FRIENDS WITH ME!

ME!

Listen to my infallible, 100% correct advice all the time and become the GOD the cosmic deities destined you to be.

TJ, out.

4e769802

Why?

Cuz I get paid to do this, son.

Pantheon Longboards

Based out of Newton, Pennsylvania, this family-owned brand is off to a hot start with some slick looking decks and higher-wisdom vibe. On some third-eye tip, Pantheon seems to be about the actualization of a vision the brains behind the whole operation has been cooking up for quite some time.

The results?

Sick ass boards, son.

IMG_7644

Booyahhh

I took some pictures of the lineup and thought I’d repost the specs from the Pantheon website along with some personal thoughts on the decks. Cause you know. What I think is helluh important and stuff.

FIRST OFF THE MUHFUCKIN LOGOS:

IMG_7610

40 Inches Long
23-28″ Wheelbase
1/8″ Crescent Drops
1/4″ Rocker between drops
Flat Truck Mounting
Micro-Flush Mount
CNC’d Wheel Wells
8-Ply Canadian Maple Construction
Ayahuasca Graphic

IMG_7609

Keeping up with trendy and functional topmount shapes the Logos feels solid underfoot. I really like the extensive variable wheelbase options; mega cool for really tweaking the feel of your ride. The microdrops work well with the rocker, and the flares make their home along the bends quite nicely. There’s even a little bit of kicktail action going on if you like the inner wheelbases if you’re into that sort of thing. And the whole hallucinogen-inspired graphic really does tickle me pink. This board totally doesn’t suck; good job guys.

NEXT UP THE GATDAMN GAIA DECK

IMG_7617

-38.5 inch length
-10 inch width
-1/8″ crescent shaped micro drops
-wheelbase options from 23 to 28 inches
-progressive radial concave with through-concave drops and tail
-micro-flush mount at 23″ wb option
-CNC Wheel wells

IMG_7614

This is neat. The kicktail is wayyy more pronounced than the previous deck which is awesome for those of y’all still on that ‘skate everything’ tip. The crescent drop looks a little funky but still workable since they are shaped kind of like footstops, and the taper ties the whole shebang together to still feel like a classic longboard deck. My only qualm is that I’d only be able to use the drops the way I’d want to if I was using the inner wheelbase since I like to have my feet really close to my trucks whilst riding topmounts. I feel like I’d struggle using the drops well while mounted on the outside wheelbase but that might not necessarily be true for other riders. Still a solid design and spinoff of a classic shape.

AND THEN WE HAVE THE NEXUS.

IMG_7621

36-inches long

30-inch wheelbase

10-inches wide

1-inch crescent drop

drop-through

mucho concave, but you know…in a way that’s comfy

9-ply rock maple

IMG_7620

Mixing it up with a double-drop mounted deck, the Nexus strikes me as a rad long-distance push/freeride/technical downhill monster. The lowered center of gravity allows for easy pushing and the initiation of drifts while the longer wheelbase allows for big, sweepy turns at speed. The forked ends of the board protect it from curbs by allowing your truck baseplate to take the brunt of the impact, which may not be to your liking if you have invested in expensive precision trucks. Still a cool shred-sled, bringing back 2009 in a big way.

WHATS NEXT? HUH?! WELL ITS THIS THING

IMG_7631

ITS THE NEXUS AGAIN, but this time she’s topmounted.

38 inches long
29-30 inch wheelbase
9.8 inches wide
9-ply maple construction
1-inch deep crescent drops
Symmetrical
Eddie Kihm Graphic

IMG_7632

A little narrower and offering a slightly shorter wheelbase option, the topmounted Nexus still offers a lot of the same things its drop through version does with just a few tweaks so that you the boarder can really pick out the deck that fits your style on fleek. And its symmetrical for going ham switch; also a cool feature.

YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS A SICK DECK THEY MADE?! THE EMBRYO YO.

IMG_7634

Uh huh

IMG_7635

Length – 36.5 inches

Width – 10 inches

Wheelbase – 25.5-29 inches

Rocker – .25 inches

Concave – Plenty!

8-ply Rock Maple

CNC Wheel Wells

CNC Flush Mounts

IMG_7639

With all these crazy shapes and designs lately, the Embryo is a breath of fresh air hitting us with a simple, classic shape with mellow rocker almost reminiscent of the old Comet boards. Not much to say about this board since it is pretty basic ya digg. Overall a solid addition that rounds out Pantheon’s lineup pretty well.

WHATS THE LAST BOARD IMA TALK ABOUT?! IS IT LA LUZ?! IT IS-

LA LUZ

IMG_7640

-34.5 inch length
-9.875 inch width
-wheelbase options from 23-28 inches
-progressive radial concave
-1/8″ crescent shaped microdrops
-1/4″ rocker
-flush mount at 23″ WB
-CNC wheel wells

IMG_7642

With wheelwells transitioning into bitty little cutouts this deck will probably allow you to run slightly larger wheels than some of Pantheon’s other topmounts. I personally like this one a bunch since its a bit narrower which would allow my smaller feet to be able to get solid leverage over both rails of the board, as opposed to standard 10″ wide boards where I gotta shuffle around a bunch just to do my shit. Comfy rocker, cool shaped drops, another board to get riggedy riggedy wrecked on, son.

Be sure to check out more of Pantheon’s boards at their site http://pantheonlongboards.myshopify.com/

R.I.P Fivemile Skateboards

All empires will someday meet their inevitable demise.

Some simply fall sooner than others.

The end of Fivemile has weighed heavily on my mind for quite some time now, but after conferring with my former teammates I can only conclude that sometimes, thats just the way she goes.

10666187_721895701215659_404829578_n

It doesn’t do well to be too bummed out about it though. At least we raised hell while it lasted, and that is the irrefutable truth.

I remember when I first met the hard-talking tattooed pirates that ran the whole operation. I was but a scared little boy afraid to get bump-drafted by the big dogs and they were all mad scientists fervently declaring their next crazy advancement in board-shaping to be on par with that of the second coming of Christ.

Lost in the tide of technical jargon pertaining to triple-drops and mustache-rocker, I struggled to make sense of what exactly it was that I was riding, but then again in all honesty I didn’t really care.

The boards just felt good. 

10598640_325446244287276_784775801_n

So I rode em. I rode em again and again and again, broke a couple, saved up and copped some more. Rain Daley was on the team back then and he was one of the first really good skaters to take me to the sweet shred-spots near where we lived and teach me how to not kill myself down the runs. I was hooked.

Careening down chunderous runs without knowing how to pendy can get all sorts of ugly; I had to lose a lot of skin before I figured out how to slow down right without bailing into a bush.

But you can only suck for so long before you inevitably start sucking less.

10593473_1537060493181568_517449025_n

I watched a million skate  videos and tried copying the styles of all the coolest riders at the time. It just so happened to be that some of the best skaters were local to my area and were more than down to call me a pussy and tell me I’m doing it wrong.

Trial by fire baby.

The whole Five Mile team as a whole was always down to kick it with my grommy self at events, always up to no good and never about the stress. It was a beautiful era in the longboarding spectrum of development; there was no standard metric for steeze and people didn’t try so hard to be something nobody understood.

It was all just a weird, good time for no reason and that was the best.

10802622_1495865594011121_935343667_n

In that environment I eventually got picked up by them and proceeded to embark upon a series of wild misadventures with the team, the least of which include raucous fight-circles and one incredibly memorable encounter with a bear.

10731580_876268252386412_129926806_n

To be honest I’m surprised they all didn’t kill me; the scene at the time could be quite overwhelming for a little boy.

But it was still the best time I had ever had that far into my life. I could never have imagined feeling that alive while I was still just your average garden-variety nerdy degenerate.

10632008_556380717822725_912135076_n

And all too soon its over, just like that.

And I’m okay with it. It sucks, but I couldn’t be more grateful for all that I’ve learned from my time with them.

Cody Shea, ringleader and one of the evil masterminds behind the whole shebang had some parting words before we all split ways:

Over the past 10 years we have put our blood, sweat and tears into this vision we call Five Mile Skateboards. Since the beginning we’ve had the pleasure of creating our own unique decks to offer the world, created some rad videos, met an enormous amount of incredible people, travelled all over the world, sold our products on nearly every continent, and created relationships that will last a lifetime. Those experiences we wouldn’t give up for anything in the world. Like many good things in life, some things simply can’t last forever. With that being said it saddens us to announce that Five Mile is closing its doors after 10 wonderful years. It was a very tough decision for us to make, but we feel we have given this amazing ride everything we have to offer and it’s time we all move on to other things. We are very proud of all of our accomplishments over the past decade and we feel this is the best decision to make at this time. We want to publicly thank everyone who supported, helped, and believed in us for so long. We would also love to thank Resource Distribution for the tremendous support they have given us in offering Five Mile to the world.

Many of us, including our team riders, will be moving on to join other companies and we support every one of our riders in pursuing their skating careers. I myself will be joining Riviera Skateboards, Paris Trucks, and Divine Wheels to continue to bring the world high quality videos and plan on remaining involved in this industry that has given us so much. We here at Five Mile are a huge family and though it breaks our hearts to have to make this announcement, I have to say that we are excited for these new opportunities and we wouldn’t change anything even if we could. This company has helped us grow into the people we are today and I’m very proud of everything we’ve done the past 10 years.

With all that said, we would like to offer all of our supporters a chance to get your piece of Five Mile history while they are still available. We are working with a few of our loyal Five Mile distributors and retailers to spread whats left of our stock around and make it available at a lower price. We’re asking our retail partners to offer all of our last decks at the price of $89.00 each. So if you’ve been waiting to get your hands on one of our decks, now is your best chance before they are all gone! We are sad this day has come but we are also happy to offer our fans and supporters this chance to own one of our decks for a fraction of the original price. So get them while you can!

We would also like to acknowledge the many people that stuck with us over the years. To any riders who joined our team past and present, you know who you are and you know what you’ve done for us. We will never forget all of you for keeping us moving. It’s been truly a pleasure and a dream come true working on Five Mile all these years. I can honestly stand here today and tell you we gave it all we had, and we are proud of what we’ve done for the downhill skateboarding industry.

Though this may be the end of our past, it also marks the beginning of our future, and we are proud to know our legacy will last forever.

With much love and respect to all,

Cody Shea
And The Five Mile Family

Lordy, we gave it a good run. Buuuut its time to put the horse to bed. I don’t even think thats an expression but I don’t care.

Good night sweet prince.

fivemilebannernicole4